3rd Week Letter from MTC...

Oiiiiiiii.  

Tudo bem!!! Loved the Dear Elder y'alls are so cute! I bet
Alaska was rediculously fun! Slash you met Shakira's neighbor and didn't teach her
about the gospel? This is going to be a slow and round about process, but as
soon as Shakira accepts the gospel everyone else will too? Blashepmy? Probs.
But my whole district talks to me about Shakira all the time. She is like our
district mascot or something. Slightly innapro, but we are positive she'll
figure out that Portuguese is better than Spanish, accept the gospel, and marry
one of our Elders? Mission Probs.  


Also, thanks for sending my yellow fever card. The yellow fever
jokes were abounding, and Sister Cotton threatened to get her VISA and NOT pretend
she had lost her yellow card too, so then I'd be left alone! I want you to know
that if that happened, we would probably be over. As in not companions, and I
would hate her. For obvious reasons. A companionship is like an arranged
marriage. You are together through thick and thin or Heavenly Father will be
dissapointed in you. We even have a theme song...  

"Here comes Sisters Cotton-Mills, riding down the mission
trail. Hippity Hoppity the gospel's on its wayyyyy."  


It's a winner. Obviously.  

Okay so down to business, this week I tried to keep a list of
things to talk to y'all about so I didn't forget everything in the moment like
last week. So get stoked. Also, for everyone reading this. Dear Elder me por
favor? I'm starting to look lame when Sister Cotton gets like 4 a day...  


First. I finally shaved my legs! Of course I wrote this last
P-Day, so they need to be shaved again, but I had been a month without before and
the Elders were all begging me to shave them. SLASH looking up words like
"repugnant" in the english-portuguese dictionary? It's fine. I
finally broke down because a native Brazillian teacher told me that in Sao
Paulo everyone shaves. Jokes on me. Although I'm preeeeetty sure there are some
people somewhere who don't shave, and once I get out there I will befriend them
and turn back to my Granola ways. Sorry for the TMI, but this was necessary to
the work if true, you know? People don't want to accept the gospel from a
Sister in sheep's clothing.  

Second. The teacher sitch. Okay, so we have two teachers
everyday but Sunday. Turns out our first investigator "Fernando" is
now our teacher Irmao Read. He is 6'5'' and speaks Portuguese faster than a
native I'm almost positive. Sooo that's been interesting. Irmao McGill and
Irmao Read are the best. We've broken them down and now they make jokes with us
all the time, and we are known as the fun district. Everyone comes to play with
us. Although we've had to start kicking them out when we are done with our yard
time. This is spirit prison nao? Irmao McGill is our new investigator
"Rafael" and he thinks his life is perfect, he has a wife Adriana and
a 1 year old (boy or girl, still not sure and debatably too awkward to ask)
named Yudu? Youdi? Yodu. Nao se. He corrects us every time. So is life. Que
vergonha (how embarrassing). I think it is our mission to figure out how to
apply the gospel to his life, but jokes on Irmao McGill because that's how I
feel about myself. This nut will be easy to crack. I'm now getting proficient enough
to make jokes in Portuguese and last lesson I had him red in the face/crying.
Success? Then Sister Cotton quick bares her testimony while he is incapacitated
and then I ask him to be baptized. Estou brincando. Except it kind of is like
that... hahaha. Irmao Read is harder because he is playing "Michel"
(PS they play pesquisadors they had on their missaos, so they know how they
would react.) who has a wife Sheila (who he is actually married too! No law of
chastity THIS WEEK, good thing because our first week was awkward enough!) and
two kids Davee and Isabella. Michel doesn't know which church to join because
there are so many! SCOREEE! Neither did a young boy named Joseph Smith! When I
heard Michel's reasons for investigating I about morrei (died - the double RR
makes an "H" sound, so "I die present tense is morro.
HILARIOUS). We teach two lessons or so a day and it's nice because we don't
really have to prepare anymore for very long. When we were first here it was
out daily activity learning the words from the lesson and deciding who would
say what, but now that we know enough to be... understandable? We can better
follow the spirit. I know multiple times this week I said something in a lesson
I did not know how to say. Words I heard one or two times were brought to my remembrance.
I know these are role plays, but I know that the spirit participates in them.
That we have his gift, and that missionary work is real. When we leave each lesson
our fake investigator is again a "real" person and made stronger in
their testimony of the gospel through the spirit. Nos tambem. Irmao Read and
Irmao McGill have been out of town a bit lately so we have had visiting
teachers who play new investigators. One of our subs is Irmao Goody
(prounounced GOOD-OI). His pai is the 1st counselor in the Brazil area and you
can tell he grew up with a general authoridade. He is also TOTALLY a
Brazillian. He told me there is a Brazillian Shakira and that she is better. Probably
falso, but I'm excited to find out? Also he told me when I get a little bit of
a tan and if I speak with a perfeito accent I will look Brazillian and no one
will know I am American. Also that my personality will fit in PERFECTLY with
Sao Paulo. Which of course we already knew, but was so fun to be told. He was
super blunt slash hilarious slash mean and our banter gave me EPIC EXCITEMENT
for Brazil. I'm ready to go. I know that God knows us each individually. We are
his children. Nothing happens by chance. He chose me for this at this time and
I've never been so sure of it. I know the gift of tongues is real. I know I am
not perfect at Portuguese but I am getting better, and it's through the help of
my Heavenly Father that I can even start to construct each broken sentence.  


Third. I gave everyone in my district their huminal and I
MIIIIIIGHT have opened a can of worms. HA! They made a poster of us with our animal
heads in our mission attire, and they also ask me about EVERYONE we ever meet.
It's a talent, but I'm trying to only use it for good you know? Buttttt YOLO!
Or as Elder Wilson said the other day (PS we have a quote book and I am in it
like 5 times talking about food. FATTYYY.) - it was probably against the rules,
but YOLO!  

Fourth. Elder McLaughlin is our new District leader and it is
MUITO vergonha. We love him so much, but Elder Carney has been our District Leader
until now, so at the end of the song we'll all turn to Elder Carney to see who
he wants to pray, or we'll ask Elder Carney if we have any mail. It's a rough
transitition. He also forgets he isn't the District Leader and that gets
PRETTTTY hilarious. Elder McLaughlin is super into politics so he makes all these
jokes about how "He cannot take Elder Carney's place but he is succeeding
him." Soooo Elder Carney was pretty much George Washington. With a red
patch of hair? Perfff. Also, Elder Carney burst his appendix (probs because we
are so stressful) so he was out for a couple days last week. It was crazy how District
G just pulled together to help him. All but one Elder has now had hard core
medical problems in our district and none of the sisters (KNOCK ON WOOD) so we
are constantly praying for saude (health.) Oracao (prayer) has been our refuge
for the past couple weeks and I personally think it is because the Lord knows
we are all a little... TOO humble (HA!) and we need to rely more on him and his
will.  


Anyway, I'm outtie. I love you and miss you like crazy. I hope
the blessings you are recieving are awesome in my wake. I know I'm sacrificing
muito for you to get them! HA! But really, I love you and hope everything is
going well back in AZ! OH also, I met someone who works here at the MTC who
served his mission (he said so lamely) in MESA, AZ. Hahaha. I was like what
wards?! And he goes have you heard of Lehi? I was there for 7 months! HA! It
would have been Elder... Berardi? Or something close? His name was sketch and
he made me repeat it like 12 times and I still forgot it. Oi, life of a
misisonary. Never prepared with a writing utensil? Anyway, he said he lived in what
I'm guessing is a Nelson house, and that his fave person in the ward was the
ward mission leader "Brother.... Dana, he had like 2 kids, Shelll...
and  Cooper?" Hahahaha. Morro. I was
like BISHOP DANA now IRMAO! Anyway, shoutout, he says hi. Hahaha.  

Alright for reals, I'll talk to y'all next week!  


Sister Haley Kristina Mills